Friday, March 2

Hear me moan, baby

What a bloody week, between babyboy being off school for two days and having the windows and doors replaced, I don't feel like I've had a second to myself. I don't do well when I'm denied personal space so I've had a few manic, hand-flappy episodes. The kids find these laughable, as do I when it dawns on me that I'm talking nineteen to the dozen about something that really isn't as important as my extremely urgent and excited tone would imply.

It's not just that I've not had 'alone time', I know I won't calm down properly till I hear on tuesday whether we have to testify at a crown court trial or not. It doesn't help that I wanted to get to the gym every day this week to work my nervous energy off but have been surrounded by people asking stuff of me all day every day instead. Oh, then I looked up the website today to check class times and one that I was interested in is run by a guy with the same name as step-dad ffs. Coincidence is a cunt.

Not getting to the gym doesn't help with my crappy body image since quitting smoking/gaining weight again either. I've been a total yo-yo for the last five months now and it's killing me being back in size 16 jeans. Nnnggggg! I'd deliberately not eaten a load of crap since quitting but still gained loads (I know it's a metabolism drop thing - it still equals a bigger arse!) so this week I've eaten anything around, anytime I fancied. Cos that's such a sensible thing for me to do when my mood is so up and down, mess around with my blood sugar too. Go, me! I remain the thickest intelligent person I know. Not to mention the most stubborn. I spent two days and nights metaphorically giving Harley the finger and not texting him cos he'd not texted me one morning, he spent 48 hours thinking I was no longer interested. Doh.

Still, the sun is shining, babyboy is back at school, my window boys are finishing off today and Harley and I are communicating again. I will actually get an hour or two to myself before I have to run around doing lots of pick up/drop off things later on today - huzzah! Ooh, the excitement of choosing whether to wash up or tidy the garden might just blow my fragile little mind!

15 comments:

Lady in red said...

oh you sound so much from the same page as me.

big hug

Vi said...

I contest the statement that you are the thickest intellegent person you know - I reckon I could take that title off you at times!

Midnight said...

Yep I'll join the competition for thickie of the year too! I nearly called it arse of the year, but that may have been misconstrued and I don't think I'd win on that score.

Anonymous said...

If I don't get my alone time on a (very) regular basis, I get very tense and unhappy. I remember reading some self-help book that said I should make sure I get at last half an hour a week to myself. Half an hour a week! You have to be kidding! An hour or two a day is what I need!

Ordinary Girl said...

The crappy body image thing is awful FB, definitely know where you're coming from there! And yeah, I'm also a thick intellectual who eats most at her fattest and spends most at her poorest! Go figure!

Perhaps Harley can help burn off some extra calories :-)

Anonymous said...

We all need down time, I like to go for a coffee after work I just park up my bike and thats it, If I am at work, I hide in the toilet and try to do a sukido, if thats how you spell it, but sometimes it takes so long I have to give up and go back.

Jungle VIP said...

Yes. Yery good indeed, have picked up on this today through Mr Angry, Will spend time finding out about the site now.
I don't a second to call my own sometimes either. It's hateful.

JVIP

Anonymous said...

Christ, if I had kids, I'd implode.

Wild Cat said...

I'm with you too. I don't get much me time at all. I used to love lying in the bath for an hour, reading. These days I grab a shower and run.

It must be the time of year for feeling low about the way we look. I've been having a real confidence crisis too (and still am).

Mummy said...

i hope you chose gardening in the sun ... you are right, you wont relax till tuesday is out the way. hope it goes ok for you.

and forget body issues - you have FAB titties!! dont ever forget that!

Anonymous said...

Remind me again, what do they look like?

Ordinary Girl said...

Hope tomorrow (well actually today!) goes well for you FB x

Mummy said...

thinking about you today ... kia kaha

always kris said...

lol @ fwen imploding and Joie saying "FAB titties"...

FB it must be something in the air, we all seem to be moaning about the state of our lives. Moan away, just glad to know Im not the only one.

MommyHeadache said...

Ooh, I hear you. We have so much snow here and they close the schools and sometimes the kiddos are home for a few days, and, it is all I can do to not blow my top. It'll get better I promise and I know you'll get back into the gym!